tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-152108192024-03-23T14:16:18.529-04:00Still Learning As I Go5+ yrs down the road i still don't know what i'm doing but my kids love me and thats all that countslissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15945194696332221021noreply@blogger.comBlogger41125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15210819.post-1371977938171500542018-09-16T16:11:00.001-04:002018-09-16T16:11:19.387-04:008 Years.
8 Years. September 16, 2009 my world fractured and I fractured along with it.
My mother who was one of my best friends died when she was 50 and I was 28. She wasn't supposed to live and neither was I, she had Sheehan's Syndrome or disease either way in 1980 it was kind of a death sentence. As for me I was born with bleeding on the brain and seizures.
We both hit milestones we never lissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15945194696332221021noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15210819.post-85090479730410095982012-10-12T01:12:00.001-04:002012-10-12T01:12:19.000-04:0012 years..12 years ago i tried to find the bottom of the bottle. well many bottles. a reckless move i was a miserable 20 yr old with a grudge against the world. the chip on my shoulder started to crack and then i gave up. the moment i walked in the door the drinking began and until i passed out that's all i remember. it was an unconscious thought that had been building for months, i was miserablelissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15945194696332221021noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15210819.post-55648676988988978162011-11-20T06:50:00.002-05:002011-11-20T07:24:21.632-05:00The Birth, The Life and The Death of Red. and her eventual return.Red had a short life, born from anger fueled by hate and brought down by something different. Love. Once upon a time lived a girl whose name was Red. She was full of somethings- hate, anger, unhappiness and a major grudge against life. Live which had led her down just like love had. Red once knew love, she gave it everything she had only to find the other person hadn't felt the same. So it ended.lissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15945194696332221021noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15210819.post-59790279728567942902010-09-06T14:01:00.002-04:002010-09-06T14:06:29.289-04:00Happy Anniversary9 years married as of yesterday, and what did we get for ourselves...hubby had food poisoning and i got a headache. maybe next year we can get the date/hotel room we've been wanting.i have to start trying to keep myself pulled together Sept 16th will be the first anniversary of mom's passing and i dread it. i shut down after she died and it affected my marriage and life. i'm trying to keep from lissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15945194696332221021noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15210819.post-19856476014935851782010-09-02T13:30:00.002-04:002010-09-02T13:38:43.792-04:00Time to revampi started this blog years ago so i could talk about my life and kids. well i'm taking a step in another direction. I'm going to rediscover me, my 30th birthday is approaching and i dont know who i am. it's time i found me and brought that person to the surface instead of the unsure being that i am.i want to be able to wear a pair of heels and a dress and not feel like i'm just playing dress up i lissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15945194696332221021noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15210819.post-87405461265460582672009-01-08T15:49:00.003-05:002009-01-08T15:55:59.203-05:00would things have been differentyears ago i was involved in hiding a friend cheating on her husband sometimes i wonder where things would have gone if i had told someone that knew him. i had a chance to tell one of his freinds and i didnt, i was already removed from the situation and group of people involved.would i have the husband or children i have if i simply told someone on the phone **** cheated i'm sorry but someone lissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15945194696332221021noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15210819.post-68504315591184021732008-11-05T13:36:00.002-05:002008-11-05T13:42:51.106-05:00my sort of political postmy mother called me this morning very happy that in her lifetime she has now seen a black hawaiian president elected. my parents were children/teens when the civil rights happened. mom could tell me what she was doing when president kennedy was assinated as well as his brother and martin luther king jr. i was a child of the 80s and grew up in the era of Bush Sr. and Clinton now my children who lissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15945194696332221021noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15210819.post-42525529492541954092008-07-25T16:04:00.002-04:002008-07-25T16:18:34.408-04:00mommy for 3yrs and 1 monthmy precious daughter that wont stop talking is now 3 years old and my little man is approaching 15 months.both of them are walking talking eating pooping machines. my daughter is in potty training refusal. she's used it twice and that was it....i havent figured out the problem yet. little man is next hopefully he's the easier one.its silly i have to keep explaining to my inlaws that my son has lissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15945194696332221021noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15210819.post-69394294900598231502007-08-11T00:03:00.001-04:002007-08-11T00:07:04.505-04:00surgery yesterdaywell yesterday became the end of my baby making days. i had a tubal done after having a freak iud incident. it feels weird yet like nothing happened except for the bandaids and bleeding you'd never know i had somehting done. i'm not in any pain but its only 24 hours past it. my hand is a little sore from the iv and the numbing shot but its not bruised like my elbow is from having blood drawn 2 lissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15945194696332221021noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15210819.post-82111983563187154482007-07-10T12:15:00.000-04:002007-07-10T12:17:26.672-04:00i'm scatterbrainedmy son is now 2 months old and my daughter is 2 years old. i'm gonna be moving some of my posts around since i created a knitting blog my creativity is overflowing since i picked my needles back upi shall post again soonlissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15945194696332221021noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15210819.post-61849852133831510562007-01-26T06:05:00.000-05:002007-01-26T06:22:12.625-05:00whoops forgot to updateyea ok i suck at this i know i do but its really not my fault my laptop has been dead since Dec.Dec 5th we found out what we're having....a precious little boyDec 25th we announced his name to family James Aleksandernow its jan 26th and i'm 27 weeks 2 days pg.....if you do the math its only 89/88 days til he's due and i'm not ready!!!!!i havent bought anything big yet, he's already got a crib, lissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15945194696332221021noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15210819.post-63878677213526068732006-11-16T02:04:00.000-05:002006-11-16T02:05:44.064-05:00short and sweetwe're gonna be finding out what the new baby is in a few weeks. and i still have a really bad yarn addiction and knitting habitlissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15945194696332221021noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15210819.post-68349359186122396752006-09-24T18:41:00.000-04:002006-09-24T18:50:10.333-04:00unhappyi've been over stressed the past weeks and an unhappy at the way things have gone. igave family 2 weeks to stay, find a place and move....now its moving closer to next month.i'm exhausted and miserable, i'm trying to enjoy being pregnant again and take care of my toddler and i feel like i have to stay out of their way in my own damn house! hubby and i wont provide food for them cause its not our lissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15945194696332221021noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15210819.post-3231560654093196252006-09-18T07:45:00.000-04:002006-09-18T07:47:22.193-04:00memo to my catMy closet is not your litter box!!!!!!!!!!!i wanted to search for my other crapped out power cord and the smell just overwhelmed me. i'm gonna spend the next week washing clothes because of my cati'm being nice and i didnt call her a psycho oncelissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15945194696332221021noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15210819.post-19162732947278986892006-09-18T07:26:00.000-04:002006-09-18T07:35:24.618-04:00pregnancy + dr. pepper = blahi should know better than to drink dark sodas when i know they made me gag before i got knocked up but i needed a drink and my usual drink of choice was downstairs so i grabbed the closer drink and now i feel like crapother than that i'm feeling ok most of the time unless i cant sleep then i'm not a nice personanyway next week i turn 26, i dread the idea of even celebrating my birthday most yearslissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15945194696332221021noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15210819.post-1157957229785926332006-09-11T02:30:00.000-04:002006-09-11T02:47:09.796-04:00musings from the insomniatic preggo womani have no clue if i even spelled that right.its 230 am and my darling hubby gets up at 5am...hopefully i'll be asleep by then, hopefully.tonight we took punkin to the bookstore(my fave place to be)and she was just the cutest, she kept trying to wave bye-bye to daddy and tried to make a new friend. she got away with getting a stuffed dog out of the night, she grabbed it off the shelf and gave it alissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15945194696332221021noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15210819.post-1157956107347369422006-09-11T02:27:00.000-04:002006-09-11T02:29:24.376-04:00shamelessly stolen idea for a postthanks shevon i had to do it lolYour Stripper Song IsPour Some Sugar on Me by Def Leppard"Love is like a bomb, baby, c'mon get it on Livin' like a lover with a radar phone Lookin' like a tramp, like a video vamp Demolition woman, can I be your man?"Break out the baby oil, you rock it old school.What Song Should You Strip To?lissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15945194696332221021noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15210819.post-1157489130871029242006-09-05T16:42:00.000-04:002006-09-05T16:45:30.920-04:00tomorrowmy first ob appointment is tomorrow morning. i'm looking forward to it since this baby was a natural conception on our first try after stopping birth controllissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15945194696332221021noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15210819.post-1156517448281231462006-08-25T10:49:00.000-04:002006-08-25T10:55:54.283-04:00well it may be time to change my title or somethincause i'm gonna be a mom to 2 kidsi still gotta get it confirmed but 2 tests said enough for melissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15945194696332221021noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15210819.post-1155270911462722732006-08-11T00:24:00.000-04:002006-08-11T00:35:11.470-04:00ooooo i may be going into businessi've gotten my first request for a hat to be made for someone for money. i'm still ironing out the details but i'm stoked cause its money i didnt have before and it allows me to buy yarn!i finished the hat i did for hubby and now i get to make a customized one for someone.lissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15945194696332221021noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15210819.post-1155133880444872402006-08-09T10:23:00.000-04:002006-08-09T10:31:20.473-04:00oops didnt post in july..........i've done more knittingok so in the past few weeks theres been more knitting....i really do need to finish projects before i start more.poncho has been in progress and hasnt been touched in weeks.also i was able to make the final piece to my set, i made a bag to hold the scarf, fingerless mittens and the hat, plus i'm half done with dh's fugly hat. its truly earned the name fugly.he asked for it in a very brightly lissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15945194696332221021noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15210819.post-1151475069188415372006-06-28T02:03:00.000-04:002006-06-28T02:11:09.206-04:00Last June Postagain another month has passed.....my daughter is 1 now and very much a toddler. she's walking and talks back(wait isn't that supposed to start at 13?)as for me i'm still knitting as it stands i have 3 projects going and the 4th one was already unraveled after i got really annoyed with the yarn so that one may be done with something else along with the crappy yarn.today i decided to make another lissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15945194696332221021noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15210819.post-1149443742546656932006-06-04T13:48:00.000-04:002006-06-04T13:55:42.556-04:00It's June!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!thats right in 20 days is my baby's 1st birthday party! we bought her presents and the 15th i'm getting decorations and food there may be no theme by then.as for my getting out of control hobby........2 finished projects Scarf and Shawl2 in progress projects Hat to match Scarf and a self designed Shawl Shrug i thinkin progress right now means its not visible to tell what it is yet the hat is justlissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15945194696332221021noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15210819.post-1147212379022456672006-05-09T17:56:00.000-04:002006-05-09T18:12:47.690-04:00destressed.....and creativei found something that helps me calm down, it helps so much however its gonna put a hole in my pocket cause its a knitting hobby....give or take for the past 10 years i've known how to do it but only since my daughter is becoming mobile have i had the time and patience to work on it, plus the stress from dealing with oldest brother i've had alotta time on my hands and have been knitting alotfirstlissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15945194696332221021noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15210819.post-1146285335864373692006-04-29T00:31:00.000-04:002006-04-29T00:35:35.876-04:00i'm so over it!my oldest brother and his ways that is. he needs to grow the fuck up and take accountability for his actions. i'm damn close to washing my hands of him. his stupid ass told his wife that left him he'd either live with parents or me! who the fuck said he's living with me! not me i know.he still owes me money from 3 years ago and i havent forgotten. he cant live with me anyway i live in military lissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15945194696332221021noreply@blogger.com0