Thursday, December 22, 2005

sigh.....6 months

thats right my baby is 6 months old today. i hit a parental milestone, i've been a damn good mother for 6 months at that.
as for me i'm getting past my selfesteem issues ever so slowly, i got a haircut to help me feel good about my looks(wearing a pony tail for months is not sexy at all) my husband still thinks i'm the sexiest woman there in...he better he's married to me otherwise his ass is in trouble. once i come to terms and start believing it myself again, i'm going to try to buy some new clothes that look better on me.
i'm still losing the pregnancy weight, i'm less than 5 pounds off from it, least i'm pretty sure its 5, i got on a scale that wasnt set to 0 and it looked like it said 175-178, i took the 175 lol.
i'm not feeling so bitchy today, its been a quiet day just me and the baby.
tomorrow is gonna be busy tho, laundry and the post office yay*rolling my eyes*
i had to finally take the necklace off that my mother bought for my daughters birth, now that shes getting older she constantly grabs at it and chokes me. *pretty mommy lemme see it**mommy makes choking sound*
pms is setting in i'm getting teary eyes watching La Bamba at 230am on a thursday morning...shit hubby is gonna be home in about 6 hours...fuck. i do this every time he's got duty i stay up cause i hate sleeping alone even tho the baby sleeps in the bed with me.
to those who dont understand i cosleep, i never intended to but thats how it started after her birth i couldnt move very much and ended up laying on a couch for a month, more like 4 1/2 months cause eventually i just got sick of the couch. now in our new place i havent even napped on the couch.
my word of tonight is fuck......someone get laid for me will ya?

Friday, December 09, 2005

feeling upset

over something so fucking stupid, i'm on messageboard for support and that as being a new mother and apparently you're supposed to respond to every post and comment on every picture. well i fucking cant. i'm either tending to my daughter or telling my hubby i need to get out of the house.
so instead of making a scene i let them know after xmas i will depart the board. since i'm so unsupportive to them(all of us there have 5-7 month old babies how are we supposed to respond to everything there)
it highly upsets me that someone thinks i'm so wrong and rotten, i know they were making comments about me on the sly(oh my hubby will get so pissed if i left my kid on the bed) yea thats right i know that was about me cause i left my kid on the bed cause my floor is trashed and theres no room to set her on the floor til things in my house get straight
anyway i really dont give a fuck cause i know i'm a damn good mother, my daughter loves me and lets me know(hell i walked out of a room and she calls for me)
anyway i would have posted this else where but then there'd be drama and since only one person i know has seen my blog here then i dont care.
anyway i'm gonna go and do something today

the word of the day is bitch.....go tell someone their a bitch and walk away